“Wait…not all feminists hate men!”

I didn’t really say this, but I thought it when my landlady/director of the woman’s crisis center in Ecik asked me to move out for 3 days because 2 women from a feminist league in Italy were visiting her woman’s crisis center. According to her, I shouldn’t be around when they arrived because in her words, directly quoted and translated from Russian to English, “they really, really, hate men.” I didn’t think they hated men, nor did I really care if they did. What I cared about was where they were going to sleep.

The Italians could not stay in Enbek with my landlady because she is already hosting people. So, the Italians could stay in a hotel, which is very expensive, or my landlady could offer up her crisis center apartment and say to me, “you should stay with me and they will stay in the crisis center”.

In Star Trek III, the Wrath of Kahn, Spock said to Captain Kirk as he lay dying: “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few…or the one.” Perhaps in this case, the needs of a NGO outweigh the needs of one Peace Corps Volunteer. Spock may have been right, but that doesn’t mean that I had a good feeling about it.

So with great reluctance (and with the pledge from my organization that if my landlady asks me to leave again for any reason that we would find a new place to live), I packed up my stuff and went to Enbek. During this time, I still went to work in Ecik, but at night I go to Enbek to sleep. I was not worried about my stuff because I have a locked room and I have the only key. It is terribly inconvenient for me, but the positive part of me kept telling me that it wasn’t all bad.
First, I don’t pay for food for 3 days and do not have to cook or buy food. That’s nice, and will help out my budget for this month.

Second, I hung out with the Kaz-21s in Enbek. As a group, I like them and have found them to be energetic, upbeat, nice, and very giving. A lot of them are Youth Development volunteers, a new thing for Peace Corps Kazakhstan and something that I think could be very useful here. Because of their kindness, love of kids, and positive energy, I think they will be successful wherever they go in Kazakhstan.
Third, I got to learn more about the woman’s crisis center in Ecik and the people who work there. As a volunteer that assists NGOs in Ecik and the Enbekshikazakh District, I’d love to assist them but only if I knew more about them. I live where they work, but what they do, whom they help, how they help them, and who works there is a mystery. Nobody I’ve talked to in Ecik really knows, and I find this a little bit disconcerting given that my organization has given them a grant and it is a practicum organization for Peace Corps Trainees. While I believe that they have the best intentions, both with regard to allowing me to live there and the women they serve, how they can help anyone if nobody knows who or what they are?

The first night was ok. I met the Kaz-21’s, ate pizza, had a bit of Ranch dressing, and played chess. It was fun, but I suffered my first defeat in Kazakhstan(over a year!) at the hands of Dave, who trapped my king with a knight/queen combination. It was pretty, but it won’t be happening to me ever again.

The second day I was presented with an awesome opportunity. Because the Italian women were there, the crisis organization wanted to give a presentation about what they do. My director was invited, and I went along. I was disappointed because I had high plans for the presentation, but afterwards I’m still not sure about what the crisis center offers. Or who works there. I know it wasn’t a translation problem, because the Italian woman brought a translator, and she was translating into English, which really surprised me. More troublesome, is that I feel that the woman’s crisis center has a long road to climb because nobody knows about them. They are going to have to advocate their cause like crazy so that the community knows about them, and that women feel safe enough to contact them. Still, this organization is in its infancy, and because of this I have hope. I don’t see how I could assist them in the near term but I’ll be silently rooting for them.

Disturbing on a personal level was when I saw that the lock to my room was removed. A huge part of the reason I had been so supportive was that I was assured that nobody would enter my room. And during the presentation, people were running in and out of it. I’m confident that nothing was taken (The people there are cool), but it’s the principal of the matter, especially that I was explicitly told that the door would stay locked. I’ll admit, it made me pretty mad, but I’m saving that battle for the not so distant future.

And the Italians? I met them at the presentation. Nice people. We had a 5 minute talk in English about things. Just like what I thought in the beginning, they are not man haters at all; just normal people who are passionate about woman’s rights, and that’s cool.

But wait! This story gets even better!

The night after the presentation, my landlady came to me again, and asked if I could stay with her until Monday because the Italians were flying out on Monday morning. Up to this point, I had been very cool with everything. I could see how much it meant to her to get everything going so I had been nice up to this point. Remove me from my living area for 3 nights? No problem! Go to the uninformative presentation when I have work to do? I supported you! Remove the lock from my door without telling me and not have me yell about the concept of “privacy” in 3 languages? I refrained!

PC stands for “Peace Corps”, not “Passively Compliant”, so we had some angry words.

I’ll draw out the highlights:
• The Italians will not stay in the apartment for 5 days. I wanted them out in 3 days, as was our original agreement. She wanted them to stay for 5. We comprised, and said that they will stay for 4 nights. If they need to stay that 5th night in Ecik, that’s fine but they’ll be sharing the space with me, and I get my bed.

• As per our agreement, I’ll stay in Enbek for 3 days, not 5. It’s not my site, and while everyone is nice, it’s like living with a host family and I don’t need that because they aren’t cool like my family in Karabulak. Nobody beats my host family in Karabulak. Therefore I’ll find some other place to go while the apartment is occupied.

• I will receive 2 gallons of sweet milk and new sheets for the bed. The fridge will also be turned on. (Don’t push me, I argue dirty!)

• I went on a tirade about how she should stop asking people to translate simple things to me. I’m not all-universe linguist , but I speak more languages than she does and for studying Russian for only a year I can understand a great deal if she gives me a second or two to process it. If I need help, something repeated, or if I need it just a little slower I’ll ask. I even used the Russian word for “underestimate”. Kind of like when Anakin Skywalker turned to the dark side in Episode III, I find that when I’m angry I do things better. Like speak Russian.

• I must get up at 7:30 and eat breakfast. I don’t like to eat early in the morning; I feel sick if I do. (Well…can’t win them all.)

So what happens next? I don’t know. But, I expect milk and new sheets and an empty apartment on Sunday night.